3.13.2015

Meaningless Band Names

Random Ideas That Aren't Very Good.

1. The Racquetball Incident - One I came up with well before Vampire Weekend existed. I remember the night. Well, not distinctly. I was in a cab. It was either 2004 or 2005. With a drummer who still has my 14" Zildjian Quick Beat brilliants. I never got them back. Because he really plays and I don't. But still, he owes me $144. Anyways. The RI. A band name for a non-existent band whose MO would be to chronicle the follies and foibles of post-Ivy League social life. All members would wear Ralph Lauren polos at all times. Sky blue for the men, pink for the women, and black for me, the detached and miserable observer/singer/involuntary eunuch.

2. The Mail Gays - ultra-femme gay boyz chronicle the pitfalls of breeder relations from the perspective of ultra-radical Feminism whilst dressed in USPS uniforms as reimagined by Gaultier circa 1995. !They put the "fag" in "fag hag"!

3. tornutopia - a pun on "cornucopia", the name of a band filled with righteous political anger. Who happen to wear eyeliner. And who sound like a bad (redundant), nu-metal version of Rage Against The Machine. Still, a good name for an album, well, no, but at least a track. A track. No more.

Bonus:

Retromania done right, and the only guilty pleasure I actually feel guilty about. Still. Guilty? I dunno. I tend to think that the late 1980s/early 1990s are too often maligned. One of the last flourishes of urbanism within "white pop music" if you ask me, the sound of going out into the city back when the city wasn't a mall. Where do flaneurs go nowadays?


Non-guilty because it's a masterpiece but one not meant to be listened to with other people in the room...

The Blue Nile touches me on such a deep level some times that even if I were to marry someone who loves the just as much as I do, I'd still probably ask my wife to leave the room before listening to the first three tracks off of "Hats" just so I could touch upon a moment where I am everyone else alive could actually measure up to the grandeur inherent. I still dream, at night, that there is an actual city, and a moment of life within it, that corresponds to that which is imagined in the music. Does that make sense? Sorry. I am a bit tipsy. It's been a while. How you?

2 comments:

BDR said...

Stay still slays me.

:-p said...

Yes! And also "Let's Go Out Tonight".

I think I was meant to write "marry someone who loves me just as much as I love them" or something much less hmm but I'll let it stand.

I blame VH1 for Rod Stewart.